10 year old me was so pissed that Gabriella would sacrifice true love for a dumb school but 2014 me now accepts that Gabriella was smart like home girl knew she could find dick everywhere YALL SHE GOT INTO FUCKIN STANFORD. FUCKIN. STANFORD. FUK TROY BOLTON’S WHITE ASS
dickens would either write amazing erotica or he’d spend too much time exaggerating the characters noses and foreheads to even compare their dicks to steam trains or something. just noses and foreheads bumping about the place.
Dickens would write TERRIBLE erotica, are you kidding me? His narrative voice would get in the way:
“‘My darling, I wish,’ said Mr Scruncheon, ‘to rail you,’ and indeed, his cock had reared up fearsomely as a Punjab tiger (though not, I should think, as yellow—but Mr Scruncheon was a man deeply afflicted with that sickness which causes the skin to tinge that unwholesome colour, so it is a certainty that while not as yellow as a tiger, Mr Scruncheon’s cock was a deal more yellow than it ought to have been)”
why would she sell sea shells by a sea shore when you can just pick them off of the ground for free that’s not how you run a business
She’s sold sea shells by the seashore since shapely seashore seashells stay scarce. Since she sells superior shells searchers spend centuries searching for, seldom selling simple shells, so she still sustains solid savings.
I couldn’t even read that in my head
Chinese tongue twister for your enjoyment (or torture…I’ve studied Chinese for two years and I can’t say it).
For the same reason as I have like seventeen receipts waiting for me to draw on the back of them which could easily be pressed into service as bookmarks, and yet also have *counts* five books propped open on various surfaces.
I also have fifty-two tabs open across four windows.
nothing like a microwave timer to remind u that ur perception of time is shit
u set that fucker to 45 seconds, go to grab something from another room thinking ur food will be done when u get back, u get back and its’ like 31 seconds left
or you set it to 5 minutes, go to sit down, and it beeps as soon as you sit
